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Would you like to experience more love and compassion for people and less judgment and criticism? Most people would and lots of people have described how to do this: adopt a serious meditation program and after years and years of consistent practice, you probably will achieve your goal.
I’ve written in the past about my ability to not only feel unconditional love for my wife Shelly and two daughters, but also for friends and associates. And I have pretty much stopped judging and criticizing people. Because I’ve never been a serious meditator, I was clear that meditation wasn’t the only way to achieve this very desirable goal.
I thought it was possible to create a simple exercise that would enable others to experience unconditional love and stop the negative chatter about people that makes us feel distant from them. So in the Advanced Lefkoe Freedom Course that is currently in progress, I created a process designed to do just that and asked the people in the class to use it and let me know what happened.
The results were spectacular, beyond my wildest dreams, and hard to believe. Before I describe these results, let me tell you what I asked them to do.
How to do the exercise
This exercise takes only five days.
Get into an altered state of consciousness in which you experience being the creator of your life using the Who Am I Really? Process. It is a very simple process that takes about five minutes. Anyone can do it after you’ve eliminated at least one belief using the Lefkoe Belief Process, which you can do at http://recreateyourlife.com if you haven’t already. Here is a link to an MP3 recording of the WAIR? Process: http://d3n3f57qjh51zc.cloudfront.net/who-am-i-really-new.mp3
After getting into that altered state, imagine right now, as consciousness, that everyone else is the same consciousness you are experiencing yourself as being. Using the old metaphor, imagine you are a wave over here and other people are waves over there, but all of you are essentially the same ocean.
Next, think of a specific person you know, anyone with whom you have a relationship. Imagine that person being the same ocean you are, but just looking different at the movement as a different wave. Make that as real as you can. Then describe your experience of love for that person right now and write it down.
Then write down if that experience is any different from the way you usually experience your relationship with that person and, if so, how it is different.
Do this three times a day with three different people. On subsequent days you can use people you used in earlier days, but use three different people on a given day. Don’t try to force anything.
Do this exercise for five days, three times a day, and then post a summary of what you discovered from doing this exercise on this course’s forum.
Here are some of the results from class participants
After doing this exercise only 15 times, members of the class posted the following results.
My experiences every time were profoundly freeing. I can honestly say my experience of love toward every person I applied this to increased from any number (some were a 2 or 3) to a 9 or 10. What a great and freeing thing. The people I focused on were my immediate family, clients, a grandmother (deceased) I have been somewhat grumpy about, and the LAST TWO presidents! I don’t tend to hold grudges or fail to forgive, but this takes it up a notch. Stopping feeling bad about someone by forgiving and letting go is fine, but this process added actually feeling good about them. Even with the clients, I felt connected before I met some of them. Thanks, Morty.
Judgments and negative thoughts about the other person were suspended. The experience was much different than how my relationships usually are with the other people. Usually there is judging and negative thoughts. Also there is usually more thinking and analyzing going on in my head regarding my relationships with others.
I did the WAIR process with those people I have strong negative feelings toward because I wanted to see if this would actually help me to feel more loving kindness towards these individuals.
I don’t generally hold grudges and tend to forgive people and am able to let go of attachments to any ill feelings, but it is difficult with those who really hurt me. … After I put myself in the Creator State, any negative feelings I still had for these individuals softened. Some people I felt just neutral towards. Others I felt more compassion for to the point that I actually got emotional. I was quite surprised by this, particularly since a couple of these individuals did some pretty horrible things to me.
I also tested this theory on a colleague at work with whom I had a confrontation. I now feel a lot more love for this person and we are now working on a deal together.
When I am in the Creator State, I can really experience how we are all “one” – that we are all part of something bigger and that anything is possible.I used this process every day first time in the morning with all people with whom I supposed to contact that day: my family, friends, co-workers. It was like a mental shower, cleaning away all judgments and negative feelings, keeping only love and compassion.
It was much easier to interact with people, the collaboration with my colleagues was more productive and enjoyable and the relationships with family members became more cordial and loving. I will definitely use this process on a regular basis.I too find that when I imagine myself as the ocean and people as the waves I instantly feel a oneness. I did this with a man who just recently behaved very badly around my daughter. When he came up out of the wave I felt enormous compassion for him. We are all part of the same ocean. It’s a very powerful exercise.
There are some people I do it with and feel love and others more compassion than love.My experience with this exercise was amazing and it deepened my awareness of that consciousness we are all a part of. I started out by going through the process using immediate family as my focus. I extended this to include extended family and friends. With immediate family, I experienced love as an expansion of my heart. With extended family I, again, felt that expansion though not as strongly. With one or two people I didn’t particularly care for, my judgment of them based on what they did dissolved and my love for them increased.
You can achieve the same results
Everyone who did the exercise had a powerful emotional experience of love and/or compassion toward the people they imagined as ultimately being the same consciousness they were, only showing up as a different wave. And you can too. It will only take a few minutes a day.
Thanks for reading my blog. After trying the exercise, please share below your experience of unconditional love and compassion for people. Your comments will add value for thousands of readers. I read them all and respond to as many as I can.
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If you haven’t yet eliminated at least one of your limiting self-esteem beliefs using the Lefkoe Belief Process, go to http://www.recreateyourlife.com where you can eliminate one limiting belief free.
Copyright © 2013 Morty Lefkoe
Use this information to improve your life
Try the exercise I describe in the post. You will be amazed at how much love you feel for people, even those people you had serious negative judgments about before.
Hi Morty, I am not judging people anymore and people are noticing that I do not react to the little things that they do. I’m still working with my daughter and that’s coming around also. I am reacting less and less and just need to up my unconditional love for people. Thank you Morty you are amazing!
Morty,
I’ve read some of your blogs about how to make relationships (romantic, family, friendship…etc) better. I agree that eliminating beliefs is one of the most important things to do first. But after that, what do you do ? What skills and knowledge do you need to make it more successful ?
I want to be able to deal with people effectively but I do not know how to. I was wondering if you have something that will help in this area ?
Traits like unconditional love, No-Meaning( No Judgment), Happiness, Joy is definitely good. Yet the skills( wisdom) are necessary too.
Randy
Hi Randy,
After eliminating beliefs, the next most important thing is learning how to dissolve your occurrings, in other words, the meaning you give to events, especially what people do and don’t do.
Love, Morty
Got it Morty. I’ll do those first.
In the meantime, do you have any books you recommend for relationships and dealing with people ?
“We are here to awaken from the illusion of our separateness.” Thich Nhat Hanh.
A lovely meditative exercise, Morty. Yes, it is very much what one learns through meditation.
A very assimilative and attractive explanation of Life-Energy Medicine.
Morty, to this day I have no clue how you managed to create all the crazy processes that you have. That in itself is amazing, but the fact that you continue to come up with stuff like this is just baffling. You are amazing. This is amazing. It worked for me and I have removed all feelings of resentment or grudges I had towards the people I chose for the exercise.
That’s true. I wonder how does he come up with these processes ? Morty, that’s very good