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At one point or another, everyone has uttered the words: “I am happy.” And: “I am upset.”
Notice what happens when you say: “I am
Moreover, when we say, “I am [something],” it feels as if we really are that “something.” It feels as if our entire being is happy, or upset, or anxious, or any other emotion we say we are.
But is that really who we are?
Most readers of my weekly blog have eliminated at least one belief using the Lefkoe Belief Process (see http://recreateyourlife.com) where they discovered that they are not merely a “creation,” who has beliefs and feelings and who takes action, they also are the creator of that creation.
Although the creation you think you are is comprised of your beliefs and feelings and what you do, the consciousness you really are is whole and complete, for whom anything is possible and nothing is missing.
Thus, it actually is more accurate to say: My creation has feelings, but I am not my feelings. My creation has beliefs, but I am not my beliefs. My creation takes action, but I am not what I do.
This is not merely semantics
When you experience that you are your feelings, you are totally at the effect of them. They seem to pervade your entire being and there seems to be no escape from them.
When you experience that you have feelings, but they are not who you are, you make a clear distinction between “you” and “your feelings.” That enables you to get some perspective on the feelings and to place your SELF outside the feelings, so that you are no longer at their effect.
How do you do that? There is a simple way to experience that you have feelings, but are not your feelings. I’m not talking about an affirmation, where you try to convince yourself of something you don’t really believe. I’m talking about experiencing the truth of the statement.
First, use the Who Am I Really? Process, which comes at the end of the LBP, several times. You can get a link to the WAIR? Process at http://d3n3f57qjh51zc.cloudfront.net/who-am-i-really-new.mp3.
Then, when you start having some negative feelings and you notice that you are at the effect of them, remind yourself what you experienced in the WAIR? Process: “I am the creator of my life, not merely a creation.” And then remind yourself of the experience you will already have had: “I have feelings; I am not my feelings.”
When you do that, notice how the intensity of the feeling diminishes and how the feeling starts to lose its grip on you.
Try it and let me know your experience. I promise it will transform the way you experience your feelings.
Please leave your comments and questions here about today’s post. I read all posts and answer as many as I can.
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If you haven’t yet eliminated at least one of your limiting self-esteem beliefs using the Lefkoe Belief Process, go to htp://www.recreateyourlife.com/free where you can eliminate one negative belief free.
For information about eliminating 23 of the most common limiting beliefs and conditionings—which cause eight of the most common problems in our lives including a lack of confidence—and get a separate video of the WAIR? Process, please check out: http://recreateyourlife.com/naturalconfidence.
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copyright ©2011 Morty Lefkoe
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Hi,
I had a boyfriend when I was 16 for 5 years, he had many friends whom were girls and who he text, I did not think twice about this, yet, I lost my virginity to him the week after hewent out and cheated on me, I spent months crying myself to sleep but stayed with him as I found it easier to stay with him as I wouldnt be loosing him, throught the whole relationship there was NO trust and he made me out to be crazy I could obviously check is phone etc and be worried when he would be out, he went to university and I know he cheated on me but I dismissed it all, we ended as he went travelling for 2 years, i found this very hard. I went on to have a boyfriend a couple of years later whom was very calm very quite and whom I knew I could trust, yet I got jealous a few times in the realtionship for example he stared at an attractive woman in a resturant and I would get very upset, this is what my 1st boyfriend would do and I would just worry. I ended this relationship as he was too quiet and not bubbly enough for me and was not looking for a future. I then found a new partner whom I moved in with after 4 months, he was not what I usually would go for, he had just finished a 8 year relationship and we fell madly in love straight away, after we moved in he became possive and jealous, I would become jealous back in response then he would become VERY angry, I did not speak to any men at all and started to feel awkward around male company with how he had treated me, saying all any man wants is sex, I have just today after months of been up and down left him as I found messages on facebook to a female that had been delted, when we were living together telling her he was single using very offensive language about me and exchanging numbers, he has met this person a while back and now feel they most likely had an affair whilst we were living together (also I had taken him away to the carribean 3 days before he sent this message exchanging number saying he was single) I feel angry, hurt betrayed that someone whom I have lived with has done this and been so possesive, he would call me names like whore slag bitch ugly and all sorts. I do not know how to recover from this and move on to start fresh as we had even talked about marriage. Please help, I dont know where to turn? Everyone said I had changed while been with him i became easily irritated and angry and wouldnt want to go out, yet he would go out 3-4 times a week, he made me feel guilty if i ever went out, I am now feeling anxiety about going out to any bar/club because of him, I feel sick at the thought, I am only 26 and I need help to let me socailse and be out going like I used to be, I am now quiet and timmid and nervous, how to I get back to who I was and who I used to be?
Scarlett
One thing I have troubles with is the lightness of that separation between my feelings and me. Sometimes when I am faced with conflict or pain (often triggering old stuff from my child/young adult hood), I differentiate instead. I say this won’t get to me, but in a kind of intense (not light) way that ensures the incident is not processed properly. It’s like I go cold or numb, rather than detach in a healthy way. I would like more help here!
Hi Elle,
Take a look at the video at this link and see if that helps. Let me know.
http://occurringcourse.com/#
Love, Morty
Hi Morty,
I did the natural confidence course several months ago and felt a real substantive change in my life upon completing it. These last few weeks have been difficult though, having lost my job and struggling to find another one (I know it’s external forces and shouldn’t take it to heart).
I’m losing confidence and will probably do the natural confidence course again but was wondering whether you were planning on making an iPhone app. The reason is it would be far easier to do on a daily basis while I’m lying in bed rather than sitting at the computer. Is this in the pipeline?
Hi Reg,
We are planning to create an app for the free beliefs, but not for the entire NC program, whihc is over 10 hours. We would have to charge the same $200 and people don’t spend that type of money for Apps.
Also, I suspect that you eliminated all the beleifs on the NC programs, and the lack of confidence you are now feeling is the result of other beliefs and especially the meaning you are giving your current work situation.
You ought to check out the next Occurring Course that is being offered in January, which will enable you to stop giving meaning to current events, thereby stopping all negative self-talk. Check out http://occurringcours.ecom/discover.
Love, Morty
Hi Morty,
Great Advice! When I experience a intense negative emotion such as anger, I say to myself: ‘I have the feeling of being angry’. It helps in breaking the association of the feeling with myself, so I can investigate what the real problem is – it is often not what I think in the first place – and deal with it.
Thanks for sharing
Hi Morty,
very senstitive subject and at the same time very im;portant ( that’s why is so sensitive :) ).
I would like to add something to what you said. It may appear in a way that it would be better so separate ourselves from our feelings. In fact they are part of who we are, namely our soul. Why are we feeling in certain way in relation to a specific situation ? What may be the significance of that ?
In my opinion, the feelings are our gauge to understand how close ( positive feelings ) or how far ( negative feelings ) are we from our true self, of who we are and came in this world as the crestures of God. Without them, if we are left only to our delusive mind, we may very easy lose contact with our inner self and go on journeys that are at least unfulfilling and random.
Hi Costel,
I’d like to suggest that our feelings are not a part of our “soul,” even though it may feel like they are.
Our feelings are the results of arbitrary beliefs and conditionings. Eliminate the beliefs and conditionings and the feelings automatically change. If feelings are the result of accidental circumstances that led to beliefs that aren’t really the truth, how can they be part of our soul?
Love, Morty
Hi Morty,
thank you very much for your valuable reply and for the opportunity of exploring together such an importanmt issue and being more clear about it.
I understand your point about separating the feelings from our true self in the sense that our true self is not conditioned by our feelings.
And if we are to consider the human being as a body-soul system, by nature feelings are not pertaining to the body domanin, in the sense that they are not ” material ” ( even if some of them are in relation with some chemical substances produced by the body ). Therefore it results that they are part of the soul ( the ” imaterial ” – together with our will and thoughts ), namely that part of it which actions like a measuring gauge for making us understand how far is our manifestation in this world from our true self ( from God ).
Morty,
Even though my creation is having a difficult time, there is still that part of me that realizes that the “I” is not my creation. From that vantage point I can observe what is going on, deal with it, then move on. This is one of the most important things I learned since I discovered your website. My life was taken up with living in the past and the future with very little time for actual living in the present. I don’t hold grudges and forgiveness is a matter of letting myself off the hook and living in the Now. I consider knowing who I Really Am a gift that keeps on giving.
Merry Christmas, Love and Light, to you, Shelley and your daughters,
Lauren
PS And the same to all on this list who’ve also learned the best gift IS the Present!
So true Morty. Making the distinction between our feelings and us really makes the experience of life much easier.
I will check out the MP3 later.
Awesome post. Very insightful and helpful!
You are so sure when conducting us to break free from our crYstaling beliefs that all changes In a a sudden! Your pusposes go exactly to the target, and icredibly destroy. Them all. Thaks for all! Marcia
Thank you, thank you, thank you, Morty! I have been held hostage for a while now,
by some false beliefs about my worth…seriously held hostage! I just went through
the WAIR process and it literally “snapped” me out of it! And, I’m also very aware that there’s that part of my ego that WANTS to experience pain, because without it,
then what? There actually are NO limits other than those I create and allow…WOW!
Many blessings to you, Morty, for the amazing work you’re doing for your fellow
humans. HURRAY for you!!
Hi Gaynelle,
Getting into the WAIR? state is very powerful, but it is not a substitute for getting rid of beliefs that determine your behavior and feelings. If you have beliefs that are causing your negative feelings of self-worth, get rid of them.
The ability to eliminate 19 of the most common ones can be found on our Natural Confidence program. Check it out at http://recreateyourlife.com/naturalconfidence.
Love, Morty
Last night I was able to walk up to people and introduce myself and had no feelings of being nervous, scared or worried about what they would think. It was awesome.
Thanks to my friend for giving this to me and me for getting your program. I believe you are doing unbelievable work for humanity. Again thank you and merry Christmas and a great new year.
Hi Rose,
Thanks for sharing how valuable our work has been to you.
Please share our free belief-elimination program with others like they have shared with you. http://recreateyourlife.com
Happy holidays.
Love, Morty
Yes Morty,
I really get that. I have progressed a lot since doing your program. It has lifted me from being a victim of my feelings and a victim of the events that happen in my life. I see how they happen around and through me, but I am not that. I am able to compose myself when facing difficult life situations as my mind is able to look at itself, whereas before I WAS my mind. Being pushed around from pillar to post. Now I am behind the wheel and drive where and how I want to go regardless of any crap that is happening around me. Merry Christmas and thank you for all your help. Kaaren.
Hi Kaaren,
Thanks for sharing with us how your sense of victimization has disappeared. Congratulations.
Happy holidays.
Love, Morty
ausum !!!!!!!!!!!