Last week Almog left a comment on my blog post that I think is the best explanation I received on why many people don’t take advantage of what they learn that will improve their lives—even when there is little or no cost involved:
I can think of a reason why most [people] don’t turn to receive help.
That reason is, that they BELIEVE that things cannot change. Some beliefs that cause this could be: “Change is difficult/impossible”, “I’m powerless”, “Nothing I do changes anything”, “It’s not worth trying to change my life”, etc.
These beliefs are obviously caused by multiple events, which include many unsuccessful efforts to make an impact over one’s own life. These events, I think, range from mild efforts to change one’s behaviour [sic.] to “big” efforts such as taking sessions with a psychologist or a coach, receiving medicine destined to alleviate stress, and more, but all without seeing effective results.
Or, as Selene pointed out, it’s not that The Lefkoe Method doesn’t work at all. “I’m not too sure it will work on me…other people yes, but maybe not me….hmmm.” (Emphasis added.)
Much of what people use to produce change doesn’t work
We hear from many people every single week who tell us they’ve tried years of psychotherapy, NLP, energy work, the Forum, books, tele-conferences, weekend workshops, courses of every type, etc.—and none of them have produced the permanent change they’ve been looking for. Either nothing changes at all, or there is a change that doesn’t last, or there is a superficial improvement but not a real elimination of the problem.
(My wife Shelly, a Certified Lefkoe Method Facilitator, has suggested, as a result of all these calls, that we use as a “tag line”: The Lefkoe Method: when nothing else works.)
It would make perfect sense for most of these people to form the belief, Change is difficult (if not impossible). And once you’ve formed a belief like that, you don’t think anything will help you. You are afraid of getting burned again. You don’t want to waste any more money.
As Al suggested as reasons why people don’t try some of the free things we offer:
1) nothing’s really gonna work
2) all these self-help guys are frauds
3) all these techniques are just to make me PAY
Moreover, not only don’t you want to waste your money, you also don’t want to waste your time.
Here’s a solution
If I’ve been describing you—if you are one of the millions of people who have lost hope that anything will enable you to get rid of the barriers to fulfilling your dreams, including the fear of failing—I have a simple solution. It will only take about 20-25 minutes and won’t cost you a cent.
I’m going to give you a link to an interactive on-line version of the Lefkoe Belief Process that will help you eliminate the belief, Change is difficult: http://recreateyourlife.com/change.
About 150,000 people have eliminated at least one negative belief using our free on-line interactive website (http://recreateyourlife.com). Tens of thousands of people have read my blog posts or watched our videos to learn how to dissolve meaning (http://lefkoefreedomcourse.com and https://www.mortylefkoe.com/important-improve-life/#. Ten of thousands of others have read blog posts that provided the steps of various processes to eliminate beliefs and decondition conditionings and tried those processes (use the Table of Contents or “search” bar at https://mortylefkoe.com).
As a result we’ve received literally thousands of testimonials from people attesting to the profound changes in their lives. If what has been stopping you from using the free material I’ve offered in my blog posts, on our web sites, and in our emails is the belief Change is difficult, get rid of the belief and then observe how your life improves.
Thanks for reading my blog. Please post your questions or comments about how the belief, Change is difficult, can inhibit people from trying something new that might make a profound difference in their life. If you eliminate the belief, please try some of our free material and then let us know about the improvements in your life.
Your comments will add value for thousands of readers. I read them all and respond to as many as I can.
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If you haven’t yet eliminated at least one of your limiting self-esteem beliefs using the Lefkoe Belief Process, go to http://www.recreateyourlife.com where you can eliminate several limiting beliefs free.
Copyright © 2013 Morty Lefkoe
It’s not true that nothing works. Actually, many of them work. For the last 15 years, I have been working on improving myself. Reading philosophy, Buddhist thought and teachings, scriptures from many traditions. And it gradually changes the landscape and perspective. The background of our sense of self does change, if we are sincere.
But one still struggles with the day to day, moment to moment . I did find David Burns’ Feeling Good useful, in an immediate sense, when I got stuck in a very negative and frustrating phase in life. I could manage the situation only because of the practical help I received from the book. Without it, I would have spiraled out of control. And it did have a lasting effect, afterwards.
I found the Lefkoe method a few months ago, and I worked through the free material, I immediately realized it works. But all those years of reading, and thinking were working in the background, when it happened. There was heavy emotional baggage that I was in the process of letting go, only due to those years of effort. The only money I spent in the whole process has been on books, and I never consider money spent on books a waste. It is only now, for the first time, that I have spent money to buy your material on a CD, since I know it is going to be worth it.
Hi Suman,
Notice you said that you had been studying for 15 years and yet you said: But one still struggles with the day to day, moment to moment.
That’s what I meant when I said that most courses and books don’t produce real freedom, permanently. When you eliminate the beliefs that cause the day to day struggles, they will stop. Thousands of people have told us that.
Love, Morty
Dear Mory,
I have always been a big fun of yours! I love to read your post! I met a little problem when I am trying to dissolve my meanings. You see most negative feelings are the result of fear. We think if we give negative meanings to the events, we can prevent something bad to happen.To an unfamiliar situation or event, I sometimes giv negatve meanings, so I feel safe. If I let go of that, and give no meanings . I worry I would make big mistakes! Sure we cannot know the nagative meanings are true for sure, but there is a possiblility that the negative meanings are true. So when I try to let go of negative feelings, I feel very hard!
Thank you for taking time to read my opinions about this. Looking forward to your reply !
siwen
I could not access “change is hard.” Also I sent an email to the main site several days ago and asked specific questions about purchasing programs but I have not had a response. Is there a different email I should send my questions to other than the one in the left column toward the bottom of the page? Thank you
Hi Linda,
I just noticed your post with questions.
Has anyone answered you? If not, I apologize.
If you have specific questions contact me personally at morty@lefkoeinstitute.com. I’ll be happy to help you in any way I can. You also can call our office at (415) 506-4472 if you’d prefer.
Love,Morty
Thanks Morty Lefkoe – I feel lighter about an event that has been bugging me for some time.
Hi Morty,
I’ve been working as a lifecoach for many years and have had to deal with this dynamic of resisting change with almost every client.
In some of my previous training, I learned that people are generally afraid of emotional overwhelm, and change is perceived to lead to that because it involves the unknown — “who will I be if I make these changes? How will my life be different?” It seems our egoic mind resists change simply because it is unknown.
But, I think you have also discovered the real key to what stops people. It’s not just a fear of overwhelm, but it’s a feeling of fear, powerlessness, hopelessness or ineffectiveness that seems to be the root of most emotion based problems. That seems to short-circuit into a sense that our survival is being threatened and once that switch has been flipped, it will be very difficult to make any changes.
However, by resolving the energy of fear, powerlessness and hopelessness directly using a couple simple energy techniques, I’ve found that the reactive emotional patterns disappear, including resistance to change.
So, while it is a belief driven universe, the next question I ask is “What is powering the beliefs?” And the answer to that is: energy. So, we can neutralize these types of patterns both by shifting the thoughts but also by neutralizing (feeling fully) the emotional energies that we are most afraid to feel — and that’s no big deal (not difficult) usually once you get to doing that. There is deep fear of feeling these emotions based in our childhood experiences of them, but it’s just a sensation of energy in the body, it can’t actually hurt us.
I believe there is a huge breakthrough in this insight. Thank you for sharing your wisdom!
Best,
Paul
Heloise’s tips (on cleaning) never save me any effort- that would require a robot! Zero effort is usually irreducible. Nevertheless, I know that they probably work for a lot of people.
Meanwhile, nearly everything you provide seems to have a beneficial effect. If only I could afford to go deeper! Maybe you should provide a free income-producing belief… like “Making money is hard.” It’s always better if your customers have lots of money!
I joke, but it seems like a good idea, too. Just sayin’. Meanwhile, I’m going to continue to freeload until I finally get rid of the money blocks…
Hi Morty, the video for ‘change is difficult’ isn’t working I’m afraid. It’s just a blank box with the continue button underneath, but no play icon or anything. Can somebody sort this out as I am so eager to do this video. I’m also so grateful you have done it too. You’re an angel Morty.
Hi Clare,
Sorry to hear you are having difficulties. I just tried it with Firefox and it worked. Try another browser.
Love, Morty
the mind is like a tree. if you prune out a few twigs and leaves here and there, they will regrow. if you cut out a branch, other branches will eventually re-fill the space that was made available.
permanent change requires a change at a deeper level, that’s all. if you really want to change the shape of that tree, you’ve got to keep working at it, keep paying attention to what’s there, keep shaping and pruning and working it. you’ve got to pay attention to the environmental conditions. you’ve got to encourage the tree to grow the way you want, discourage it from going back the way it was.
it will change, in time.
Hi morty,
I am a big fun of you.
According to ken wilber taking responsability for meaning making does not fully integrated intel the stratigist level. so I dont think that poeple does not want to use it I think that it is beyound their level of devolopment.
sending you my best.
Dear Mr. Lefkoe,
is CHANGE really difficult, because it’s hard to put in practise?
In my view the BELIEF ‘Change is difficult’ is a result of Anxiety.
If I take my personal story as an example, I can say that, you are afraid when thinking of your dream life. As for me, you know what you want, no matter if it’s financial, relationship, health or anything else. But when it’s time to change things, it’s like jumping over a hurdle without knowing what’s behind it.
I belief^^ there is a big lack between one’s conscious mind and one’s subconscious mind. In our conscious mind, we know ‘I am good enough’ ‘I deserve that’ ‘I can speak in front of thousands of people’ and so on, BUT their inner feeling, their subconscious mind tells them exactly the opposite. You can tell yourself ‘I am good enough’ or ‘I deserve that’ all day long, but without having this positive feeling that you really can, you stagnate, you can’t get forward.
So, we’re living in a BELIEF DRIVEN UNIVERSE, I think. I guess a lot of people have watched the movie the Secret. The message it contains is actually the same, it’s about self-awareness, Change and Belief.
I finally got the courage (1 year ago) to completely change my life in almost every aspect. And yes, it was hard at the beginning, but by the time Change makes really fun. Today I am looking forward to change, Change has become a part of my personality. :)
One last thing I want to mention is this…
If you have the courage to change any aspect of your life, without knowing how it might end up for you, can your life get worse than before? You can only win if you TRY, can’t you?.
Kind regards,
Christian